Saturday, July 2, 2011

Friday Funnies: Government Employees

It was a busy day yesterday and once again (yes I have short term memory loss!) I forgot to post the Friday Funnies! I posted this a while back (read it and see how long it's been) but it's still funny today!

I hate having to go to any kind of government office. I think every government employee has to take a class on how to tick off customers. The post office specializes in slowness. The Social Security office specializes in b.s. The Driver's License office likes to give you the run around. And I am sure every other government related office in the United States is the same way. Don't get me wrong, I like President Bush. If Molly had been a boy her middle name would have been Walker (yes I am Republican). But good grief!!! This is ridiculous!!! Case in point:
I went to get my driver's license switched from Arkansas to Mississippi(pain in the butt #1). Wait in a line of 20+ people with my 4 year old (pain in the butt #2, the line not the child....well?)before I can get my number to wait again. Then when I get up to the desk, the lady proceeds to tell me the long list of ridiculous things that I must have in order to get my license. Social Security card, current license, car registration and a bill showing my legal address(pain #4). Well just for the record. I changed my Social Security card 4 years ago to my married name, but I lost it. However, I still have my original Social Security card that has my maiden name. My driver's license from Arkansas has both names as well. The "helpful" lady at the desk with the coveted numbers proceeds to tell me that I may not be able to get my license with that social security card. She asks me "Do you have your birth certificate or marriage license?" I thought about it for a minute and tried to hold back the word vomit. My first reaction was to tell her "Well yes! Let me pull it out of my purse. Because everyone carries those papers with them all the time!" Then I thought about Bill Engvall and wanted to say "Here's your sign!" But I refrained, rolled my eyes and said "you know I sure don't". She handed me a number and said good luck. At this point I was concerned. Am I about to meet the wicked witch of the driver's license office? At this point we wait.....and wait........and wait............and finally get to the desk. First thing, "that will be $20."(pain #, where am I....oh #5) Then the sign......."Cash only"......... Why the "helpful" lady at the front failed to tell me this I don't know. So we leave to get cash. Of course my bank doesn't have a branch close by, so I pay $2 extra dollars to get $20.(#6)
We return......wait again..........still waiting..........waiting.........WAITING! Finally get back to the desk. Different person this time. Hand her my money. Things are buzzing along. Along with the sound of Molly telling me for the umpteenth time she is hungry and needs to "Poop!" (that part she said loudly)(pain #7) Then the lady looks at me funny and asks if I had a license in Texas. I said yes. (all of you know that we have moved a million times in the 3 years). "Well then........ ", she proceeds to tell me we have to call the other office to get the moving restriction taken off......What!?.........we wait AGAIN!!!! In the mean time Molly is fading quickly because she hasn't eaten in 2 hours and her sweet little girl voice is turning into this shreaking, loud, whiny squeal that she needs to POOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Finally....take the picture.....wait wait wait......take Molly to the bathroom. Pick up my license and there it is. "Make checks payable to MS Highway Patrol."
It's a good thing that license is good for 5 years because I'm not going back. I dare someone to steal my purse. Because this lady will kick some purse grabbing butt!

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